Dear Snoop Dogg: Would you spread your legs for Hitler, too?

Hello, Snoop. Greggory here, coming at ya from your hometown. 

Although your music has never been my jam, I’ve loved having you in the world. First it was your vociferous advocacy for cannabis legalization. Then it was the sheer force of your personality as displayed on the Howard Stern Show. After that I was delighted to watch you fully cross over into pop culture, if for no other reason than how you were breaking the boundaries of the kinds of people that were acceptable to “mainstream” (read: White) America.

Admittedly, for a long time now one could argue that you’ve been a caricature of yourself, a shill even, shaking your ass for anyone willing to make it rain. Lighters. Shoes. Chips. Cell phones. Clothes. Nuts. Pet products. Car insurance. Gambling. Shitty beer. Shittier fast food. 

But it’s your ass, and you have every right to shake it however you like. And hey, you’ve not just been about getting paid — you’ve done plenty of good with your name and cash back here in the LBC and elsewhere. 

But now you’ve gone and sold not just your body but your soul. I’m referring, of course, to your January 17 performance at the Crypto Ball, a pre-inauguration event in Washington, D.C. to celebrate the return of Donald Trump to the presidency.

In all sincerity, Snoop, I have to ask: would you have played at a celebration of Adolf Hitler? I presume your answer is no. But in 2021 Donald Trump tried to stay in power by suborning his supporters to storm the Capitol, which they did; and when he pledged to pardon these insurrectionists (“hostages,” he repeatedly called the jailed), he removed all possible question of his intent. (And he’s made good on this campaign promise.)

So where do you draw the line? How much fascism would be too much for you to celebrate? Death camps for Jews — not okay, right? Would you have played Sun City during the Apartheid Era? No way! But attempting to stay in power through the violent overthrow of our electoral system? Apparently that doesn’t bother you one bit. 

So what exactly would be a bridge too far? Once upon a time Donald Trump was way, way over the line. We know that because of what you said on Instagram eight years ago:

What happened to you, dog? When did power and fame start making you so wet that your conscience came dripping right out your ass?

Well, we see you now. We all see you. Maybe it’s time for you to take a hard look in the mirror.

Love (formerly, at least),

Greggory