LIFE AFTER MOTHER: Living One Year at a Time

Answering the question, “What are you doing with the rest of your life?” can begin with, what’s doing this holiday season—which takes up the rest of this year—and what are you doing with the coming year. I don’t make resolutions, as those tend to be about habits that often require a change in lifestyle. I prefer to make plans and set goals, the kind of things that can be put on a list, given calendar space, and when they’re done, they’re done.

When I look back at what I’ve accomplished in 2022 and compare it to what I planned to accomplish, I find most of what I did get done involved putting the family home in my name and managing my “new” household. I got probate closed and I now own a three-bedroom home, free and clear. I got the third bedroom painted and a dresser painted, the gate on the south side of the house replaced, and some broken-down lawn furniture disposed of. Whole carloads of hazmat and scrap metal and obsolete electronics either got hauled away or were given a permanent storage solution. I got the family collection of antique dolls and toys repaired, spruced up, and on display. I didn’t have another estate sale, but I had a garage sale that earned me a week’s worth of pocket money while taking more than a dozen surplus items off my hands.

Of course, the life that happens as we make other plans interfered. I had several minor health and major dental issues that threw me off schedule. A sprinkler pipe broke, and four companies and four weeks (and several hundred dollars) went into fixing it. My car needed some major work I didn’t anticipate.

Where I faltered most obviously though, was for anything that required more than checking off a “to do” list. Complicated open-ended projects like producing more income, organizing the family photos, stamp collection, scrapbooks, genealogy, those are jobs that have no end. They’ll eat up as much time as you can give them, month after month, year after year. Anything involving personal habits, too, whether “spend less money” or “get more exercise,” is more complicated and involves more motivation than simple household management.

Now that the house is organized, I’ve decided travel is my top priority for 2023, while I still can classify myself as an “active senior” with both time and money. Looks like I can take anovernight “staycation” to San Diego in March, and make a little longer trip to Arizona and the Grand Canyon later in the spring. If I can block two weeks in early fall, I can perhaps add “visit Mt. Rushmore” to my list of lifetime achievements. Somewhere I’ll attempt to squeeze in a visit to the relatives near Seattle. The house and everything in it will still be here for me to work on when I get back.